Mentoring: 5 Things I Have Learned From Being A Mentor

I have mentored for a number of years now. They are mainly accounting professionals working full-time, and often in one of the big four accounting firms, who are upgrading their qualifications to a bachelors degree through Oxford Brookes University. The mentor is there to be someone who can guide them through the maze of requirements and many may be highly experienced and professionally qualified and yet they have never studied at this academic level before. It’s a new experience and having a guide who has trodden the path before can help ease the journey.

The Mentoring Explosion

The use of mentoring has exploded significantly in both corporate life and within a variety of organizations, both big and small. Whether you are being mentored for the first time, or if you have just accepted the role of mentor, I want to give you 5 things that I have learnt about being a mentor during the past few years:

1) Be a Critical Friend:

By ‘critical’ here I do not mean offering negative criticism, instead you need to be aware that you are offering positive comments and guidance. You are not overtly critical, nor are you just there to be their friend and tell them what they want to hear. It may mean that you sometimes tell them something that is difficult for them to take – see the ‘wake up’ call later on – but you are failing in your duties as a mentor if all you do is tell them how well they are doing, if it isn't true.

2) A Sounding Board:

When teaching or training, I always tell my students, “there are no stupid questions, only the ones that go unasked.” A mentor needs to be someone who the mentee feels comfortable running their ideas and questions past, no matter how outlandish they may seem. It is not the role of the mentor to validate or reject those ideas, instead you need to offer probing and guiding questions that will help the mentee to clarify them and then come to their own conclusions as to their validity.

3) The Voice of Experience:

It helps if the mentor has already trodden the path that the mentee is following, not just once but multiple times. However, whilst being the voice of experience, that should not blind you to the fact that the mentee may actually come with a fresh pair of eyes and see something in a new and innovative way. Just because you are looking through the eyes of experience, this should never blind you to the different perspective of your mentee.

4) The 'Wake Up' Call:

Sometimes our motivation fails us. Life takes over and the things that we planned to do get done are submerged by work and family commitments. A mentor does not provide the motivation, this can only come from the mentee themselves, although it is useful for them to know that there is someone out there who is following what they are doing with interest. However, there comes a point when they may not be progressing or they have come to a full stop. As a mentor you then provide the wake up call – take them back to the reasons why they started the project, or whatever it is they are embarked upon, and ask them whether they are still valid and if they are going to complete on the original basis. Perhaps the original objectives need to be changed, but a good mentor helps the mentee to refocus on what is important and encourages them to get their mojo back.

5) Guide DO NOT Lead:

You are not there to say, ‘this is the path to take’, instead you say, ‘these are some of your alternatives’. Some mentors assume the role of leader, by providing too much of the motivation, where they think it is lacking, or by telling the mentee what it is they need to be doing and how they need to do it. If it all goes wrong, then the mentee will rightly blame you and the relationship will sour. This approach also develops a relationship of dependence, rather than encouraging the spirit of independence that sees real growth on the part of the mentee. For mentors that come to the role with a great deal of experience it can be hard, but it is often better to lead from behind and take a step back by being the sounding board and critical friend along the journey.

These are just five of my own personal reflections on being a mentor, you may have others, but I hope that you derive some benefit from them. Have you been mentored, what did you learn from the process? Have you been a mentor, what would you offer other would-be mentors as good advice?

Written by Will Trevor - Founder and Training Consultant for Windsor Training: will.trevor@windsortraining.net

Picture Credit: By BazzaDaRambler (Which way?) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Surviving your Business Nightmares

Surviving Your Business Nightmares

Four business lessons of Gordon Ramsay

Chef Gordon Ramsay: What do you mean 'no crab cakes'?

From the outset I have to admit to being a big fan of the hit TV show, Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares, both of the original UK show and the even grittier, though slightly more formulaic, version that airs in the USA.  The expletive-laden outbursts and the ego-maniacal owners, coupled with the confrontations and the final resolution, make for compelling viewing.  Although no further episodes are now going to be made, the show often runs on several channels in the USA at any one time, including BBC America. Nevertheless, whilst this is primarily a piece of popular TV entertainment, there are some valid business lessons that can be drawn from Gordon Ramsay’s style and approach.

If you can't stand the heat ...

Anyone who has ever worked in a restaurant or hotel kitchen can testify to the sometimes febrile and volatile atmosphere that exists. The egos of chefs and owners can often blind them to the reality of what is going on within their business, many agree to appear on the show as a last ditch attempt to save a business that has been hovering over the precipice long before the ‘man in the whitecoat’ puts his head around the door and blasts them with an f-word laden broadside.  Much has been made in the media of the fact that a significant percentage of restaurants subsequently folded after appearing in the show, but this may be more a result of the fact that they were already on the ropes, rather than being directly attributable to Ramsay’s interventions.  Having avidly viewed many of the episodes, here are four helpful business lessons that I feel can be drawn from Gordon Ramsay’s approach, whatever your business:

"I'm Gordon and you are?"

Firstly, there is the personable and team-centred approach to everyone in the organisation, at whatever level. Saying that Gordon Ramsay has a personable and people-centred style of leadership, may sound slightly oxymoronic, given that he is renowned for the explosive and confrontational approach that he adopts in the show. Nevertheless, he always engenders a team spirit amongst the members of the business and approaches everyone, from the pot washer to the manager, in an inclusive and even-handed way. Partly this is personality, but it is also symptomatic of the need to keep a diverse team of people together, such as those you would find in the average kitchen, and tied into a common vision. He tries to pull everyone along who share in the vision, but this doesn't blind him to the need to cut out the deadwood, if they are sabotaging the mission and holding the business back.

"You can't serve the customer that!"

Secondly, no compromise on quality for the customer. He is an acknowledged and respected expert in his field and he has a laser-focus on delivering quality to the customer, even if this requires trampling on a few egos in the process.  He has no time for chefs that lack the passion to ensure that the food leaving from the pass is of the highest quality, made from the best freshest produce; but also in ensuring that the front of house is focused on giving the customer a quality experience. Here his approach is similar to that of Steve Jobs at Apple or Jeff Bezos at Amazon, both of whom were known to blow-up at those who don’t share the same passion and obsession for delivering a quality customer service.

Ego ...

Thirdly, don’t let ego blind you to what is going on within your business and seek help, when you need it.  When we have been running a business for a while, we become proud of that achievement and, sometimes, that pride blinds us to the need to seek help from time to time. A coach or a mentor, which is often the role that Ramsay is playing here, can help us lose the scales from our eyes and focus on a clearer vision for the way ahead. To help achieve this, he often has to confront that self-belief head-on and he is certainly not shy of pricking their egos in order to help them see the best way forward.  Often the coach can see the business more objectively and look beyond the obstacles that we believe to be insurmountable, with solutions that help us achieve our goals and fulfil our vision.

Keep it simple

Finally, keep it simple. Many of the restaurants that he visits have over-long menus or produce unnecessarily complicated dishes. Ramsay encourages them to focus on what they are good at and play to their strengths, whether that is a culinary style or the availability of local home-grown produce.

It’s not often that you can draw business lessons from a hit TV reality show, but Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares may be an exception because of the subject matter and also the format within which they approach the specific problems of each restaurant. In one respect it is a televised version of a management consulting process, but focused on the catering trade. Nevertheless, I do feel that these four business lessons are something from which we could all draw some inspiration, but maybe with not quite so much swearing.

So, what are you waiting for? Get the #$@&% on with it!

Written by Will Trevor, Founder and training consultant at Windsor Training
Email: will.trevor@windsortraining.net

Picture Credit: By 'gordonramsaysubmissions' [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons